Aerick's Surgery

Yesterday was Aerick's surgery and it went very well.

He was such a trooper, woke up fine yesterday morning, didn't ask for anything to drink, which is very unusual for him.  He said he was hungry once during the 45 minute drive, but once I told him he had to see the doctor before he could eat he was fine with it.

Once we got into his room in the Short Stay Unit we changed him into his little hospital outfit.  SO CUTE I might add.  We even brought it home :)

Then we had to wait until it was time to give him his sedative and such.  They brought a tv in so that Siera & Aerick could watch some tv.  I'd also packed a backpack for Siera and there were a couple of cars in it.  So we pulled the cars out for Aerick.

For whatever reason he refused to look at me and give me a regular smile!  He loved playing with the cars and especially loved it when Mommy vroom, vroomed with him.  Siera was having a good time too.  "Fixing" Daddy's chair...

As Aerick was waiting the bands on his ankle were really irritating him.  Poor guy.  He also cuddled with Mom and Dad some because I mean, how freaking boring!  LOL

After a while it was time to give Aerick his sedative.  Thankfully they let me give it to him and it must have tasted awful because he tried to spit it back at me and to be honest, it stank.  BAD.  He also hated the pulse/ox monitor on his big toe.  It was kinda funny.

After the sedative you just have to watch.  He didn't really get loopy or anything, just kind of...  Silly?  Yeah, I suppose you could say he got silly.  Seriously though this is why you don't give children drugs.  Just look:

Tell me that isn't the funniest looking thing?  The last picture was right as they were coming in to take him from us for surgery and he had been trying to eat me.  He'd opened his mouth really wide so I thought he was trying to give me a silly kiss, but then I realized he was actually trying to bite me!  And he was making the noises too.  He actually reminded me of ME when I've been drinking, LOL.  Such a silly kid, love that boy to death.  I'm so glad we did the sedative before they took him from us because he was more than complacent.  He even went willingly to the nurse that took him to surgery.

I love that boy so much.  It broke my heart to send him with her, but as you can see he has big brother's pony and a blanket from home.  I didn't cry either!  What a good Mommy I was.  From there we took Siera to the cafe for some breakfast.  That actually wasted the PERFECT amount of time and I'm really glad we took her instead of leaving her with a sitter like we'd originally planned.

Once we got back to the reception/waiting area we made a cup of tea for Aerick to drink when he got out of surgery.  Siera watched a few minutes of cartoons and the elderly woman who was guarding the door gave her a few Care Bear coloring pages and some crayons.  She was very, very happy.  Then they put us into a small room so the doctor could come tell us how it went.  He came in and the surgery went very well.  He told us to expect Aerick's scrotum to have a pucker in it because they weren't able to stretch the testicle as much as they wanted to.  Then we went back to Aerick's room to wait for him:

It took nearly 10 or 15 minutes before they finally brought me my baby!  He was just lying there as they wheeled him towards me, but as soon as he heard my voice he started fussing.  Poor punkin'!  I felt horrible that I'd put him through this.

I'm so glad that he got to take his big brother's pony and his blanket with him.  I think that helped.  He felt SO hot when I touched him but he wasn't really that hot.  I picked him up within seconds of taking that picture.  He hated that IV, poor punkin.

He loved the Sierra Mist though!  LOL  He drank two of those sippy cups of it.  Then we had to sit and wait, wait until he'd freaking pee!  He never did pee so they went ahead and discharged us.  We were told just to keep an eye on him.

We switched cuddling him from time to time.  Though I cuddled him the most :)  Siera was such a good girl.  She was a little wild, but nothing like usual.  As long as we kept her mostly entertained she did well.

On our way home we stopped and got some Taco Bell for lunch.  Siera fell asleep while she was waiting, Aerick vomited and Ken cleaned him up.  As we got on the freeway to get home I gave Aerick a piece of his quesadilla and he ate some of it then passed out.  On the way home we had to stop at WalMart to pick up some diapers and his pain medication.

Once we were actually home I sat on the couch with Aerick and ended up lying down.  Apparently I fell asleep for about an hour and a half.  Which was good.  Aerick never moved, just laid there in his mama's arms.  I think he loves me, LOL.  Siera went wild once we got home.  Absolutely crazy!  She was jumping on things and running around, making noises, keeping Aerick up, etc.  I got up and let Aerick lie down on the couch for a bit, then he fell asleep.  In the meantime Siera was trying to wake him.

I realized Aerick hadn't pee'd yet and it'd been nearly 8 hours.  I called the doctor's office and they said to wait it out and then if he still didn't pee to put him in a bath.  If that still didn't work to take him to our local hospital.  I hate, hate our local hospital, so I was praying that the bath would work.  I waited for Aerick to wake up, waited for Ken & Siera to finish eating and then I put about 3 inches of warm water in the bathtub.  I climbed in and put Aerick on my lap.  I put his feet in the water and his bottom on my leg (so that his incision wouldn't get wet) and he started to tinkle.  He got scared and stopped so I reassured him that it was okay and he finally finished.  The water turned a little yellow.  Poor punkin had obviously been holding it all day.

At 9 he asked to go to bed and he went right to sleep.  He slept until 7 o'clock and was completely soaking wet.  I put him into bed with me and apparently he climbed right out and came into the living room to play.  Ken said he was running around, jumping, and playing as though he'd never had surgery.  I got up about 10 and realized that he was indeed doing that.  It was insane.

He asked about 11 to get into his crib, so I put him in there, but at 11:30 he still wasn't asleep, so I got him up and let him play for a bit.  At 12:30 Siera and Aerick weren't behaving and definitely weren't listening so I put them into bed.  Siera went right to sleep, but Aerick took until about 1:15 to fall asleep.

I did some stuff online and then decided to blog about my baby's surgery.  So here it is.

Anger

As I sit here waiting for Siera to fall asleep because I decided to bring her home instead of letting her stay the night at a friends house I've been thinking about my life.  My no good, horrible life.

My husband is an abusive asshole.  He threw a remote at me Friday night.  It hit my elbow and now there is a bruise.  I need to get a picture of it.  Why'd he throw the remote at me?  We were watching tv, Riley started barking and Ken started saying something to me.  I said, a little snotty, "if you're going to talk could you please pause the tv?"  So he got pissed and threw the remote at me.

Since then I've pretty much ignored him.  We can't discuss ANYTHING without it being a fight.  Tomorrow is Aerick's surgery and I'm super anxious about it.  I can't discuss that with him though because he gets all irritated and pissy with me.  I have no idea what the hell for!!! 

Over the course of nearly 5 years he's called me: irrational, psycho, crazy, stupid, and several other not so nice names.  He calls my family and friends names.  Yes, my family isn't the most stable and I don't particularly care for them now a days.  However, they are my family!  It hurts my feelings when he says those things regardless of how I feel about my own family.

I'm so angry and so hurt.  Ken just being around me makes me angry.  Ken calling the house makes me angry.  Ken LOOKING at me makes me angry.  I'm so damn angry it makes me sad.

I hope the caseworker I emailed gets back to me soon.

Mundane

My life is so mundane.  Ken is back to telling me that he's going to sell the house.  He's not really trying very hard to find a job, as far as I'm concerned.  He DID buy a newspaper the other day, CRAZYYY.

This weekend was incredible.  My younger sister brought her 2 boys to my house and spend the weekend.  It's been so long since her boys got to play with my children.  They were outside ALL DAY on Saturday, which meant the doors on my house were open all day.  I loved it and reveled in every minute.  The kids were exhausted, in bed and asleep by a decent time.  Two kids put themselves to bed at 8:30 p.m. and then they kept going, dropping like flies until about 9:30 p.m.  Then they woke starting at 7 a.m. until about 9 p.m.  It was so wonderful.  I was sad when the boys left yesterday,  not so much about my sister!

I got some good pictures, but I'm not going to post pictures of her boys because they're not my children.  Despite the fact that I doubt she'd care, I'm still not doing it.

I'm exhausted from it all, but it's all good.

Today was taking Frank to the hospital for some blood work.  We have to make sure his kidneys are functioning well enough for him to take the contrast that he needs for his CT on Thursday.  Sadly, Aerick has his pre anesthesiologist appointment in Medford a few hours after Frank's CT.  It's going to be a long, desperate day!  LOL

I'm still trying to prepare myself for Aerick being in surgery.  Especially taken from me before he's asleep.  *sigh*  Anyhow, not much else to tell.

Oh other than Ken throwing a fit because Frank doesn't like to go to McDonald's or any of the quick "restaurants" for meals.  He likes to take us out to eat every once in a while for helping him out by taking him to the doctors appointments.  However, Ken hates it when he does because he doesn't really have the money to do it.  While I understand that he hasn't paid any bills this month, hasn't taken us out to eat in a bit, so I didn't see a big deal with him taking us to breakfast this morning.  Ken was irate with me.  And he's fucking indecisive as hell.  Ask him where he wants to go to eat and he will NEVER make a decision.  I have no idea why, but he does it with other things as well, not just eating out.  Anyhow, we ended up going to Elmer's and it cost us about $50 for 6 of us to eat. 

Ken has been muttering all afternoon, "$50 for breakfast!"

My Life

Why is it that when the Mom feels like shit it doesn't matter?  Suddenly Dad isn't feeling well and he gets to lounge in bed all day with no kids interrupting.  Yeah, he's lying in bed while I've been sick with a cough for 4 days (can't stop coughing!) and he had the nerve to tell Siera to get out of our room that he "needed" time to rest.  *cough*bullshit*cough*

Yes, I tell Siera to go play but I never tell her to just leave me alone simply because I "need" or "deserve" time to myself.  Mommies don't have that option.  Mommies have to troop on.

Well, Siera had another dental appointment this week and it went really well.  At her pediatrician appointment a couple of weeks ago I asked for an anti anxiety for her.  I was advised to give it to her as close to 3 1/2 hours before her appointment.  So despite having a 10 o'clock appointment and didn't end up in the chair until 11, she still let them look in her mouth and do the x rays.  We're having 4 front (top) teeth pulled, 2 top molars pulled, the molars on top capped and, I believe, the eye teeth capped.  We may also need to have the bottom molars capped, but I didn't catch that in the correspondence.  We'll see.

Aerick is flip flopping on the potty training which is fine.  Honestly, I'd rather he wait until after his surgery, but whatever floats his boat.  Next week we have his pre anesthesia appointment and then 4 days after that is his surgery.  I'm nervous, but I know he'll be fine.

James has his parent-teacher conference at his new school tomorrow and, of course, Ken got a fucking job.  So, now I may not be able to go because it's not very productive to have children running around while I'm trying to listen to the teacher!!!!!  Don't get me wrong, I'm REALLY glad Ken got that job because we need the money, but hot damn!

At some point in the next few days I need to take Frank to get some blood work to make sure his kidneys are functioning okay, then the same day as Aerick's pre anesthesia appointment I need to take Frank for a CT scan.  My life is just never, ever ending.  I can't stop coughing, I should really be seen by a doctor, but I can't.

So, anyhow, there wasn't much to post the last week, but there ya go.  An update on us, for now.

I didn't turn the tv on for the kids all day so they're just now watching some and they're ecstatic!  LOL  Yay for Little Einsteins, Max & Ruby, Dora the Explorer, Ni Hao Kailan and Word World!!!

Realization

So, I realized that I don't need to post everyday.  I'm too boring for that.

Besides, all I did yesterday was sit around and yell at the kids!  LOL  No, seriously, Siera is such a handful that I'm just not doing well with it.  She hadn't napped since Friday, but then today, ahhhh, today.  Today she napped!  What a blissful one hour that was.

Today was another whatever day.  I do need to shower tonight because we have a playdate from 9 to 12 tomorrow.  I'm so excited.  Homemade whipped cream with strawberry yogurt for dipping the apple slices and then roasted vegetable Ritz and whole grain Club crackers with slices of cheddar cheese.  Yum, yum!

This afternoon I finally got to watch Jason & Molly (The Bachelor) get married. :)  Hooray!

I try to lay the kids down about 11 a.m. for naps and then I have to wake Aerick at 3 p.m.  Typically he'll nap all day long if I didn't wake him.  This afternoon I walk into his room to find him climbing out of the crib onto James' desk chair that Siera had left next to his crib.  He was so sleepy and yet had this huge grin on his face.

Then bedtime comes.  I left the chair next to his crib all day so that when bedtime came I could coax him to climb into the crib and climb he did.  SOOOOO proud of himself.  I still left the chair there to test him and see if he'd climb out.  Sure enough he did.  Then he played with Daddy for 5 to 10 minutes, went into his room, shut the door and climbed back into bed.  As I opened his bedroom door he had flopped onto the mattress and was preparing to tuck himself in.  When he saw me at the door he jumped up, both hands in the air and said, "I did it!  I did it!"  "I did it!  I did it!"  LOL  Cutest damn thing I have ever seen and I have 3 fucking kids!

Now I'm going to eat spaghettios with  meatballs and call it a night.  Kinda.

Boring

Are you bored reading my blog yet?  Yeah, so am I, but it gives me some clarity!  LOL

Siera will not stop peeing her pants, so we took away her television watching.  We'll see how she does tomorrow.

Aerick is still trying to potty train, LOVE it!

Um...  We were supposed to have dinner guests, but the wife's grandfather died today.  *moment of silence*  Dinner was a London Broil on the grill, garlic mashed potatoes and corn.  YUM

Then we put the kids to bed (Siera doesn't nap anymore so she was t.i.r.e.d!)  Well, now I'm lying in bed with the husband.  He's asleep, of course, after 5 minutes of watching his thing.  So, I'm going to log off and watch some tv myself.  I'll probably go get myself a snack or two or three :)

Emotions, Emotions

So, James had to go back to his father today.  That's not a big deal but he freaked out when I picked him up on Friday and then today when we told him he was going back.  It's quite ridiculous.  Need to figure that out...

It was a pretty uneventful day.  I woke to the kids screaming through the house, which I don't enjoy, but it happens when Daddy is in charge.  He means well...

Fed them ham and cheese hot pockets for lunch, then laid Aerick down for a nap and sent Siera & James outside to play.  They only came in to bathe (about 45 minutes) and then went back outside, but this time Aerick was up so they took him with them.  Then I made mini corn dogs for dinner and served them with applesauce.  Shortly after that we needed to take James to his dad.

On the way home I asked Ken to run through Dairy Queen and I got a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup blizzard with chocolate ice cream.  Siera was asleep before we got to the drive thru so we just came home, put her to bed, let Aerick watch a show and now he's in bed.  So, I'm logging off to head to bed to watch tv myself.  I haven't had dinner yet, so I'm sure I'll be hungry in the next hour.

Somewhere in there I did a load of dishes and made myself some lunch.  I also bathed the kids, LOL.

Long, Tired Days...

I had trouble falling asleep again last night...  I have no idea why, but that's alright.  I'm working on it.

I've missed a few days so let me try to catch up.
Thursday - I awoke with a migraine after 7 straight hours of sleep, plus 2 additional hours after I dealt with Aerick.  Frank, my father in law, was supposed to have a check up with his radiation doctor, but it got canceled before I even woke up.  Thank goodness!

Since I had a migraine I just lounged all day.  Ken had to work that day, but Aerick was due for a nap shortly after he left.  About 20 minutes after Ken left I laid Aerick in his crib with a fresh cup and I had Siera call Auntie Mariah.  She was instructed to tell Mariah that Mommy was sick and that Auntie needed to come out to our house!  She did pretty well talking on the phone, I was very surprised.  However, Mariah didn't understand exactly what she was saying, LOL.  While Aerick was lying down I managed to doze for about an hour.  Siera actually sat on the couch for a good portion of that time because she knew that Mommy wasn't feeling well.  At some point in that hour Siera heard Aerick and ran down to see what he needed.  She brought me his sippy cup, so I filled it and sent her to give it to him.  She gave him the cup, "tucked" him in, shut the bedroom door, and told him that she loved him!  It was soooooo sweet to hear her being a doting "Mommy" to her baby brother.

Once that hour was over Siera said she wanted McDonald's and asked if her Auntie Riah could bring her some.  I told her she had to call and ask, so she did!  I'm so proud of her :)  Anyways, she managed to convince Auntie to bring her some McDonald's and then I got Aerick to finally sleep after he'd eaten.  Siera wouldn't be quiet any longer, but to be honest she was such a good girl for most of the morning that I couldn't blame her for getting all nutso after lunch, LOL.

Friday - Well, I had to go get groceries.  I thought I was going alone, when all of a sudden Ken said he and the kids were going with me.  le sigh  Shortly after we got to the grocery store I got a phone call from Chris that he was already in town and he'd bring James to me.  Awesome!  I met him at the front of WalMart and took James to finish grocery shopping with me.  At some point I had to send the kids and Ken to McDonald's because they were just driving me nuts.  I rushed through the rest of my shopping and got into line.  By the time I got half the stuff onto the belt Ken and the kids had caught up to me.  We finished up and headed home.  Thankfully Siera & Aerick had fallen asleep on the way home and they continued to sleep once transferred into their beds.  Then I got to put away all the groceries and make myself lunch.  For dinner I ended up just making the kids Hamburger Helper Singles, peaches & pears and yogurt.  They ate pretty well, but I had to put James to bed at 6:30 since he was being SO defiant.  All the kids were in bed and asleep by 8:30 p.m.  Wonderful!

Today, Saturday - I met Chris to give him James since today is his daughter's first birthday (and thus her party) and we wanted James to be there.  Then I ran into WalMart to grab a few things I forgot yesterday.  While I was in there I saw Chris, James, his fiance and their daughter.  I headed home and prepared for Ken's father's dinner.  I made a cake, a beef roast and yum, yum.  LOL  We finished up dinner by 4 and were eating by 4:15 p.m.  Then I got a call at 5 p.m. that they were done with the party and such, so I left to get James.  When we got back we did cake and sang Happy Birthday to Grandpa.  Siera & Aerick went to bed at 7 and now I'm going to get James something to eat and be done with the evening :)

Days Seem So Long

The days just seem so long and I'm not sure why.  I went to bed at 10:30 and 11 respectively two nights in a row this week and then I went and fudged it up last night by staying up late to watch my recorded Bachelor and After the Final Rose Ceremony.  *sigh*  I realllllllllllllly need to learn more self control.  I'm sure sleep is a big culprit in my long days, LOL.

Siera had her pediatric appointment yesterday and it went really well.  Debbie Ayoli checked everything on her twice to reassure me that she's fine.  So, the dentist saying to have her tonsils looked at in a concerned voice was for nothing!  She also mentioned that Siera's ears hurting is probably because of her teeth.  *sob*  My poor punkin'.  I'm glad I'm doing something now, but I waited too long to stand up to Ken and that pisses me off beyond belief.  I waited so long that now my daughter is in pain.  I was also told to just keep playing with the kids' diets.  Maybe they're sensitive to gluten, but not celiac, y'know?  Therefore I will continue to watch our diets.

We took the kids to McDonald's after her doctor appointment and for whatever reason Aerick soaked through his diaper by the time we got there.  I swear this kid is on newborn diaper changing schedule!

This morning we had our WIC appointment.  That went surprisingly well.  5 years ago when I was on WIC with James they had an office full of mean, mean women.  Thankfully I had a super nice woman today and I know her!  LOL  She was my sisters "worker" when she had her kids and was on WIC.  That was reassuring...  We get per month for each child: 3 gallons of milk; 1 quart of milk; 1 pound of cheese; 32 ounces of whole wheat bread, tortillas, or brown rice; 16 to 18 ounces of peanut butter or 16 ounces of dry beans or peas; 36 ounces of cereal (like Kix, Chex, Cornflakes, etc); $6 for fresh fruits/veggies or frozen, 1 dozen eggs; and 2 - 64 ounce bottles of juice or 11.5 or 12 ounces of frozen.  All of that times two for our family is soooo helpful.  I cannot express how incredibly appreciative of this program that I am.

After our appointment we needed to go to WalMart to fill a few vouchers and, at the very least, grab some diapers for Aerick.  We're going through a box every 7 to 10 days, instead of 14 days on the nose...  While we were there Siera decided that she wanted soda, then she wanted string cheese.  Ken finally picked her up because she wasn't following us and she kicked and screamed.  It was horrible.  I have never been that embarassed before because of my children.  Ken told her he was taking her out to the car and then didn't.  That is SO irritating.  She KNOWS that Daddy won't do shit about her which is why she acts like this.

So then when we get up to the checkout we're in a superbly long lane with a superbly slow checker.  A new checker came up and opened the lane right next to us and summoned us over.  Of course we went, we were the next one in line.  A woman came rushing up beside us and about jumped on me.  When I started to put stuff on the belt she started sighing.  Then we realized that I had mistakenly grabbed 38 ounces of cereal instead of 36 ounces, so I had to send Ken to grab a different cereal.  Wouldn't you know, I also grabbed the wrong fucking peanut butter.  There were only a couple of 18 ounce jars so I had just grabbed one.  Well, duh, I grabbed Low Fat and on WIC you can't buy Low Fat.  *sigh*  The woman behind me said in a pissed off voice, "She's got WIC" when I sent Ken to exchange the cereal, then she got even puffier when I had to go exchange the peanut butter.

I had 3 checks to fill and as I was finishing up the first one, the freaking woman behind me was inching closer and closer.  I still had 2 more checks, plus the diapers and soda in my cart.  I finished the rest of the checks and then tried to put the soda and diapers on the belt.  There was just no way that was going to happen, so I went around the other side, told Ken, "you need to take care of the soda and diapers because this woman just keeps getting closer."  Apparently he didn't hear me, but he took care of the rest of the stuff.

When we got to the car I explained why I was so pissed off and he is NOT happy.  Honestly, I'm not a confrontational person, but if I hadn't had my children with me I would have said something to this woman.  She was so close that I could have looked to my left and touched her with my NOSE.

Chicken with an italian dressing packet over it, parmesan Pasta Roni and a vegetable.  Hopefully bedtime will be at a decent time tonight so that I can *fingers crossed* go to bed early.

Have a great night!

Relaxing Was My Name-O!

I relaxed most of the day.  YAY!  I also got a chance to watch a Lifetime movie during nap/quiet time.

I managed to do some dishes and make dinner.  So at least everyone was fed.

Tomorrow Siera has a doctor appointment.  We need to talk about her tonsils, her bowels, her ear and her attitude!  LOL

The kids are in bed, so I'm on my way to watch some tv and then off to bed myself.  6 a.m. comes mighty early when you have to be at the doc's office at 8:30 a.m. and it's about a 30 minute drive depending on traffic!

How in the world could I forget?  After dinner I stripped Aerick of his diaper because he looked so soggy.  Within a few seconds he passed some gas so I said, "Aerick do you want to go potty?"  Of course he said yes so we ran for the toilet.  I read him 2 books and started on a third when he started to go poop!  And then he pee'd.  He was scared when he realized that he was pooping, but boy oh boy was I ever proud!  Once he calmed down (a whole 2 seconds) he got super excited and gave both me and Daddy a high five and then gave Siera  big ol' kiss!  It was soooooo sweet!!!!!!!!!  I'm so proud of my little one.

Whistle While You Work

Boy, I have no idea what has gotten in to me, but this last week I have done nothing but clean it seems like.  Today was more so than the other days.  For the most part I was just doing a load of laundry and a load of dishes over the last few days.  Oh no, not today...

Today I:
     *turned cartoons on for the kids and watched a few with them
     *heated frozen waffles in the toaster and gave them to the kids
     *did a load of dishes
     *started a load of Aerick's bedding
     *put the load of Aerick's bedding in the dryer
     *started a load of towels
     *scrubbed the kids' bathroom, someone had pee'd on the floor YUCK
     *soaked the kids' bath toys in the tub with bleach water
     *rinsed toys and set aside so I could use the "tub water" for the floor
     *cleaned the mirrors and scrubbed the tub/shower enclosure
     *did another load of dishes
     *made spaghetti for lunch
     *put the load of towels in the dryer
     *made green tea for Aerick
     *made sweet tea for me by putting it in the sun
     *gave my kids the option of a snack
     *cleaned the kitchen counter
     *ate a piece of the coffee cake I made yesterday, YUM
     *played outside with the kids for a bit after Daddy got home
     *talked to my sister in law on the phone
     *put Aerick & Siera in the tub, they were dirty!
     *got Siera out of the tub, dressed and into her bed with some frosted mini wheats
     *got Aerick washed and out of the tub and dressed
     *showered and dressed myself
     *started my car so that it had time to warm up (no speedometer if I don't)
     *loaded James up in the car
     *took him to 7-11 for a slurpee (yum!)
     *met his dad to drop him
     *came home, finished my slurpee, played with Aerick
     *asked the hubs to make dinner, what we wanted we couldn't have so he made tuna for him & kids
     *kids didn't eat with Daddy so I gave them each a hot dog
     *finally got Aerick into bed about 8:30
     *it's 10 p.m. and Siera is still in her bed.  At one point she was on the couch "reading" outloud.
     *I'm hungry and I think I want a toasted pb&j bagel...
     *I'm trying to make a list of things we need for the house and groceries.

Dun, dun, dun, wasn't that a fun read today?  I'm exhausted and have a pre migraine, so I did it in list format.  Of course, that list is not in exact order and I'm positive I missed things, like cleaning the front room window while Ken spoke with his sister on the phone and I watched the little ones playing outside.  Or how I missed telling you how precious it is to see Aerick (the "baby") interacting with his big brother and sister.

UGH

Today was an interesting day.  I awoke suddenly at 8 a.m. and realized that my husband had left for work.  I never felt him kiss me, barely woke to hear him talking to Siera and never even heard his truck start.  Think I was tired?  Apparently!

The reason I awoke so suddenly was because if someone isn't monitoring Siera at all times she will get into everything there is possible to get into.  My day planner is missing, wonder if she has it?  She says she doesn't, but I'm not sure she knows what it looks like.  Unfortunately self control is NOT one of her strong virtues, so in the meantime we just keep an eagle eye on her.

As I woke I heard my alarm going off that I'd forgotten to shut off last night, so I ran to my room.  And of course I glanced into the boys' room.  The site I saw was just beautiful.  For one, I forgot James was home, so that was wonderful in and of itself.  But the most beautiful thing I saw was Aerick standing at the edge of his crib and James reaching in trying to hug him or tickle him, I'm not sure which.  However, the smiles I saw on my boys' faces is what made my day.  James is such a good big brother and he really loves his siblings.

I got Aerick out of his crib and we all came out into the living room.  For once in Siera's 3 1/2 short years she wasn't demanding food as soon as she woke (makes me think Daddy fed her some before he left) so we chilled in front of the tv for about an hour.  Aerick and James sat on the loveseat with me while I tried not to fall back to sleep and Siera sat in the middle of the living room floor.  My goodness, things like that make my heart smile so big.  My kids are such blessings and I tend to forget that in the day to day stuff.

After a bit I got the kids up to the table and gave them each some Trix.  Aerick, of course, didn't want to eat!  Instead I gave him a fresh sippy and made him at least sit at the table with the big kids.  Sometimes when I do that he eats, not today!  As they ate I started a load of laundry, emptied the dishwasher and dish strainer and re loaded the dishwasher.  The kids were done eating so I cleaned up their breakfast dishes and started on the counter.  I am determined to find my day planner, Flat Stanley is hiding in it and I must send him home next week!

Then I had to get everyone dressed and out the door.  Ken needed me to deposit some money into the account.  Since I was in town I ran into WalMart to grab a few things.  Namely, invitations for James's birthday party.  Poor kid wants Kung Fu Panda and nowhere in Southern Oregon can we find it.  Therefore I took him into WalMart to choose something else.  Lo and behold he sees...  Spongebob...  Gag me now.  I hate Spongebob and only allow my children to watch it because we no longer have Noggin and after a certain time in the day there are no longer cartoons and we can only watch so many recorded cartoons!!!!!

Happy, happy, joy, joy, I get to plan a Spongebob Squarepants birthday party.  Lucky for me I do not always go along the "theme" of the party.  So, we're doing a baseball game, possibly a fruit roll up game - if I can find decently priced organic fruit roll ups, I refuse to have a bunch of food dye vamped kids running through my home and I'm not sure what else.  I'll figure it out.

I did a quick run through of Taco Bell for cheese rollups for the kids and a burrito for me.  Then off to home where I put the littles down for naps.  Siera went right to sleep, but Aerick took nearly an hour to fall asleep.  James, of course, didn't nap, but "rested" instead.  Thankfully Siera took a 2 1/2 hour nap and Aerick napped until I woke him at 5:30.

At WalMart I had bought some Totino's frozen pizzas.  They were intended for lunch, but since we did Taco Bell I made them for dinner.  Yay me!  Applesauce was included for the kids and they gobbled their dinners down like expected.  After dinner they ran around like monkeys and I made a coffee cake.  It's been nearly 10 years since I've had coffee cake, let alone made one.  YUM.  I so look forward to eating some of that later.  http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Streusel-Coffee-Cake-2/Detail.aspx

I did warn the children that for lunch tomorrow we are having spaghetti with leftover spaghetti sauce that I used for lasagna last week.  Need to expand our grocery money, therefore we're eating more leftovers. :)

Put Siera & Aerick to bed about 8:30.  It's now 10:12 p.m. and Siera is in my arms and Aerick has been fussing in his crib.  I didn't get a chance to check on him before Siera curled up in my lap.  Hopefully she goes to sleep quickly so I can take care of Aerick and get James to bed.  James is still up, yes.  *sigh*

Oh, also today, I had to call Valley Immediate Care.  When James came to me yesterday his father told me he had a bacterial lung infection and he was on amoxicillin and a steroid.  Um, no.  They didn't do bloodwork, I am SO not cool with giving my child this shit, so I called.  James had the start of an ear infection, tonsilitis and pharyngitis.  I'm still not pleased with the steroid, but it is what is and it's not harming him.

I've got Siera off to bed and checked on Aerick.  He's sound asleep.  I'm going to let James finish watching Disney's Prep & Landing and then off with his head!  Errrrrrrr...  I mean, off to bed!!!

Urology

Aerick's urology appointment was yesterday.  It went really well.  Dr. Bui came in, explained how he'd be moving the testicle back into the scrotum and told us the risks, etc.  Then he asked to see the area, so down went Aerick's pants and I took his diaper off.  Dr. Bui seemed glad that I knew what he was talking about and that I had done my research (*sigh*).  Anyhow, we're scheduled for Monday, March 29th at 8:30 a.m.  I could really use your prayers!  Our pre anesthesia appointment is Thursday, March 25th.

We grabbed KFC from Grants Pass on our way home and ate that for lunch.  Then we had Riley's friends over and we hung out all afternoon/evening.  They helped us to finish up our KFC (yes, we ate it for lunch AND dinner, LOL) and left about 9:15 p.m.  I was in bed by 10:15, sooooo not normal for this mama!

Today I had to get up early to do a telephone interview.  SCAM, did ya hear me?  S-C-A-M!  Oh well...  Lesson learned, kinda...  Then I got the kids ready to go and out the door we went to pick up Grandpa and take him to get some blood drawn for his doctor's appointment next week.  He's a frustrating old man and sadly, I'm getting tired of listening to him tell me that we bought a house that was too expensive.  Damnit, we could afford it when we bought it and now that there's no work we can't.  Give us a fucking break!  Then he gets irritated because I mentioned that I turned 26 three weeks ago and wants to know why I didn't tell him.  Really?!  REALLY?  I told you a few days ago because you were so insistent that you wanted to know.  It's a birthday NOT a wedding or birth.  It's no big deal.  He insists that I should have gotten a gift and not just a dinner out from my husband.  What WE decide to do for my birthday is up to us...  Just one of those days.

I have a menstrual migraine.  Maybe that's why he's irritating me so much today?  I hope so...  LOL  After we grabbed lunch, I sent Frank off with Ken and I wasted some time while waiting for Chris.  Chris and I met up and exchanged James about 2:30.  I'm so excited to have my little man home!!!

Next week is a busy week.  We have appointments three days next week!

The kids and I are watching tv right now, biding our time until 8 p.m.  2 more hours, 2 more hours, 2 more hours!

Haircut!

I went to the local beauty school, Phagan's, and let a good friend from at least Junior High cut my hair.  Come to find out I have a high cowlick, a low cowlick, a seriously thick patch of hair, very thin, baby fine hair, and just overall WEIRD hair!  LOL  It was well worth my $5 ($5 haircuts on Wednesdays!!!) and I'm so lucky I have a good friend like her.  She seemed so nervous, but I think she was just excited.  We had to trim about 2 inches off because of a previous haircut.  My previous stylist thought she was doing me a favor by razoring the ends of my hair to help with curling under.  However, all it did was make my hair look awful, not her fault, I knew it would and I should have told her no.  Anyways, my hair looks awesome now!

Today was just one of those "chill" days.  I sat around on the couch, the kids and I munched, Aerick took a nap while Siera piddled around.  She really should have napped but boy is it hit or miss here lately.  Ken got home around 2 so I hopped in the shower before I left to get my hair cut.

After my haircut I started to head home and then decided to grab some Taco Bell.  I got their $5 Volcano box.  Good stuff I tell ya!  I ate the tacos and the cinnamon twists but brought the burrito home for Ken.  He gobbled it down, good sign, right?  LOL

When I got home I had to wake Aerick, he'd been sleeping for 6 hours (give or take, it was a rough nap) by the time I got home.  They ate ice chips for awhile.  Suddenly, when I went to fill my drink, Siera decided she was hungry and she wanted fruit cocktail.  I opened the huge can of fruit cocktail.  Between her, Aerick and myself the HUGE can was gone.  I cannot believe how incredibly blessed I am with good eating children.  I mean, the boys are definitely pickier than Siera and the boys don't always want to eat, but at least Siera will be my constant!

Aerick might be getting sick.  I can't decide.  We haven't given him gatorade in a few days and he didn't have milk, so he shouldn't have diarrhea, but this evening he came to me with two dirty diapers.  The first was pretty solid (abnormal for him) and the second was straight liquid.  The poor punkin's bum was bright red in the 2 seconds between him telling me and me changing him.  I slathered him in Desitin Creamy and figured maybe he's a little sick.  I hope not, though he was a little warm at his nap.  He slept for an hour and suddenly was calling my name.  I refilled his cup and he drained it and hollered again.  He drank FOUR sippies in a 20 minute time period before I gave him some Tylenol Cold because he felt a little warm.  It could have been the fleece blanket he had on him, mixed with the warm heater temperature I had the house set to.  Who really knows?

Anyhow, I've laid Siera & Aerick down.  Turned Siera's timer on on her tv, filled sippies, tucked them in and am now going to go play with my new cut before I have to get up early to get everyone out the door tomorrow for Aerick's urologist appointment.  I'm pretty certain they're asleep and I'm pretty tired.  I suppose I should pick out outfits.  For whatever reason it helps my morning to run much smoother!

BUSY

Ahhhhh, it's been a crazy couple of days. Yesterday was so nice and sunny. We let the kids play outside for a bit and my father in law came over. So, we paid his bills! LOL

My father in law brought us a cake, he gets very angry with us because we limit the kids' sugar intake. As of today the kids have each had a few small bites of the cake, that's probably all they'll get! I do not feed my kids a bunch of crap! Though I'm not afraid to give them McDonald's either.

Then we took the kids to WalMart and got McD's while we were there, got what we needed and met Chris to drop James off. Then I ran into both of our Dollar Trees looking for Kung Fu Panda birthday stuff. Sadly, nothing :(

So, home we came and did bedtime. I couldn't fall asleep!!!! Hate that!

Today was fun... Ken let me sleep in a bit, then the whole family was in my bed, LOVE that. I got up and got ready to go, got Siera dressed, hair done, got Aerick dressed, shoes on, teeth brushed, and fed the kids some Top Ramen while Daddy got ready to go.

Off to Medford we went because Ken had to return some shingles to a company from a job he did on Friday. A whopping $200 job... That was our gas and the money we spent the last two days alone! *sigh* Oh well... ... ... We ran into Carl's Jr for a snack for myself and the kids and lunch for Daddy. I ate an entire Jalapeno burger, some of Aerick's chips & cheese, and my onion rings and I was still a little hungry! LOL

Our next stop was Target to see if they had any Kung Fu Panda birthday stuff. Of course they didn't! Sheesh, but we found these super cute popcorn holders for the kids in their Dollar Spot!!!  And they had to try them out regardless of whether James was home or not!  LOL 

So, at some point this weekend and I believe that it was on Saturday, James was teaching Siera how to ride his bike, awwwwwwwwwww.  He has training wheels and she can push the pedals, but boy oh boy, she was doing great.  I do believe we're going to be buying her a "big girl" bike this summer!

Have I introduced you to our dog, Riley?  He came to our home on November 15th, 2009.

He had a playdate on Friday evening with his original owners and their dog, Maxx.  How awesome huh!?  You can tell we care quite a bit about him allowing playdates with his original owners, LOL.

We love him so much and the kids romp on him and love on him.  He is always within a few feet of me and follows me to the bathroom, to the kitchen, where ever I may go.  When Ken gets up in the morning, Riley will get up from his perch next to my side of the bed (on the floor), follow Ken to the kitchen, wait while his coffee is made, then out to the garage and outside to go potty.  Once he's made sure Ken is okay out in the garage he comes back in and climbs into Ken's spot on the bed, pillow and all!  LOL - I love waking up to Riley curled up against me and that's saying alot because I hate being touched in my sleep!

This is what happens in my house during the afternoon.  One kid wants to watch this on tv, the other kid wants to watch this, so I separate them!  Oddly, Aerick likes to hang out in Siera's bed... ...  LOL  Although, look how cute he is!  I don't mind :)

Lately, it's been nice to be me.  Tonight was a bit rough as Aerick went to bed at 7 p.m. and Siera didn't fall asleep until just a few minutes ago at 9:20 p.m.  *sigh*  Life as a mommy, it's rough!

AUTHOR'S NOTE:  I'm still learning all this, so please forgive me if my posts look super weird!

Tireddddddddd

I am so very tired. Yesterday we ended up not finishing Siera's room like I thought we would, but I did catch up on some more laundry and dishes.

Today, however... Le sigh! I was supposed to get James about 11 a.m. so I got up at 8 when Ken left for work to be with the other kids and got them bathed. Then I get a phone call from Ken at 9:30 asking me to bring him something for the job he's doing. Really? REALLY!? *sigh* Alright, good thing I showered last night. So, I did my hair, my makeup and got dressed and out the door we went. Took my husband what he needed, met the ex husband to pick up James and then I was supposed to take the children to waste time. However, James wanted to go home and then Siera wanted to go home. Instead I ran through Taco Bell and got Siera & Aerick each a small lunch and got James a drink too. After we got home I laid Aerick down for a nap and tried to lay Siera down. She wasn't having it. Her big brother was home and that was that. I convinced her to at least lay in her bed and watch tv for quiet time while James played in the living room.

Ken came home an hour or so later and totally screwed that plan up, LOL. He brought me Subway though so I can't complain too much. I finally woke Aerick at 4 and let Siera & James play outside for a bit.

Also, today, I got an email from a woman looking for our dog. I was hesitant to email back because I thought for sure she wanted her dog back. Come to find out she really just wanted to be able to visit the dog. Even more interesting than that is that I rode the bus with her when I was in high school and she was in junior high!!!!!!!!!!

She brought her shitzu dog and her husband and came out to visit this evening. Riley remembered them and was SO happy to see them. It was a wonderful visit and I'm excited to do that playdate again :)

Siera put herself to bed at 7:30 and Aerick climbed into the crib and put HIMself to bed at 8 all while they were still here! LOL Now James is eating some popcorn and watching Word World before he heads to bed.

Then I need to eat dinner and get myself to bed. I'm exhausted tonight :)

Housework, housework, and more housework

Today was the day to get Siera's room steam cleaned. For whatever reason her room always has a weird smell to it. So, I chose to push her bed completely to one side, vacuum and steam clean that half of the room and then tomorrow we'll do the other half.

I also managed to get another few loads of laundry washed, dried and folded. Still need to put away. I also did a load of dishes and of course, fed the family :)

It was a simple, not quite done day. LOL

New Friends and Adventures

Today Aerick had his first ever dental appointment. He did sooooo well!!! He was a little freaked out when they laid him down and he cried, of course, but otherwise he was a trooper.

Siera even did really well. She just stood next to me like a big girl and tried to help comfort her baby brother. Too sweet!

Next, we went to the mall play place and met a friend that so far I'd only spoken to online. She's very sweet and her little one was soooo happy!!! We let my kids play for awhile (hers napped, LOL) and then up to the food court we went. Orange Julius hot dog kids meals for my kids and Taco Time for us Mommies.

After a few hours I had to call it quits and start the 45 minute ride home. My kids both fell asleep on the ride home and that was nice.

When I got home I put Aerick in James' bed as it was easier, then I went to get Siera out of the car. Of course the little booger woke up and wouldn't go back to sleep, so I got to watch her play outside for a bit. She's so funny to watch when she's by herself. She plays with the dog, plays on the swingset, even tries to "see saw" by herself.

I had to put a call in to our pediatrician. I haven't heard from them about the referral for Aerick. He has an undescended testicle and I really need to get it taken care of.

We had leftover lasagna for dinner and then called it a night. The children went to bed and my husband went to bed and I'm sitting here watching old episodes of the Nanny. Yayyyyyy, LOL.

Stress and Finances

Ken has hardly worked in a year. Now he's finally looking for work, but he can't find anything. We have his bond & insurance due, car insurance is due, etc, etc. It's the beginning of the year, this is when we owe thousands of dollars to places, why he didn't think ahead, I'm not sure... Trying to be patient and work through it with him. It's difficult.

Tonight was a good night. I got a lot cleaned up today. I made spaghetti sauce and made a really awesome lasagna for dinner, with garlic bread. Then we got the kids bathed and into bed.

So, I'm just chilling, the kids are sleeping and the husband is sleeping. James is back at his dads preparing for school tomorrow :)

*sigh*

Well, dinner turned out great, but my two youngsters are still sleeping. What's up with that? They're obviously not feeling well and oddly enough, I'm not feeling so hot either. I'm hanging out in bed with James right now. He's watching tv, I'm listening to music from pandora.com and surfing the 'net.

Happy Valentine's Day

So, today is Valentine's Day. I was up until 1 a.m. making Valentine cards for my kids and husband. I also prepared a plate for each child with an organic fruit strip (like fruit roll up, but healthy), a snack size baggie of Cookie Crisp cereal and a generic bluberry fruit & grain bar. My husband got a homemade valentine card and a Reese's heart (huge!).





While I was doing all of that I had a cake baking on a cookie sheet so that I could use the heart shaped cookie cutter for dessert for tonight.

This morning we decided to get the children ready and make our way to JJ North's for brunch. During our meal Ken and I noticed that Siera had raised reddish areas on her face. It was around all of her mouth, a few spots on her nose and cheeks. Quite scary and I'm assuming an allergic reaction. To what? We have NO idea. She's eaten everything their before minus the italian dressing. I asked the manager if I could please find out what was in the dressing and he brought me out the whole container. There's nothing in it that I could tell that Siera hasn't had before. I have no idea what is up, but we rushed to WalMart and picked up some dissolvable Benadryl tablets. I will keep those in my purse from now on.



At WalMart Ken pissed me off thoroughly. He gets soooo close to other cars that I seriously think he's going to hit them. The only reason I care (as much as I do) is because, in the event that he DOES hit someone, I'll be the one that has to listen to him bitch and moan that our insurance rates went up, etc, etc. Not willing to deal with it.

I got the kids into WalMart and grabbed diapers, soda, Benadryl and ice cream. Now, normally I would never allow my kids to have ice cream at home. However, with Siera's allergic reaction to who knows what she wasn't able to finish her ice cream because I wanted to get her out of the restaurant. I told her I'd pick up ice cream at the store, so I did. What a fun mom I am :) LOL

Once home Siera & Aerick laid down for naps, James made me a picture, Ken watched a show and I decorated "cakes" for the kids for dessert tonight. I'm also defrosting chicken so I can get dinner started in a couple of hours.



And now Siera is watching tv in her room, James & Ken are watching Underdog and here I sit, typing. LOL

A Fun Day

Today was a fun day. My kids who went to bed SO early last night slept until 5:30 a.m. That's 14 hours of sleep for my children. WOOT!!!

My husband was already up so he let me sleep in until 9ish when I heard the phone ring and realized it was my ex husband. He was calling to see about when I would be ready to pick up James for my weekend with him.

I picked James up about noon and we headed to town. Thankfully we met at a grocery store so while I waited with Siera we went in and got Lunchables for the children to have for lunch. Then I realized that I really should grab something for myself to eat before the birthday party that we were headed to. So I ran through Burger King and grabbed a Whopper Jr and a small onion ring, then I headed down the street to the market to get a soda. Then we went to the park and had a great time. I never did eat the Whopper Jr... AND there was pizza there *sigh* Oh well.

James and Siera had an awesome time. The cake tasted like a ding dong without the hard outer chocolate crust and we were there for 2 hours! I was freezing by the time I left!

Then we headed down the street a couple more miles to a friends house for a "photo shoot" of Siera & myself. James played with her boys and after a few minutes of pictures we took Siera to play with the boys. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO cute they are! LOL

My friend takes awesome pictures and if you're in the Southern Oregon area and need a good photographer just let me know :)

We spent a couple of hours at said friends and then came home to make dinner. Breaded/fried pork loin pork chops, a box of pasta roni and a can of corn, YUM. We all ate pretty well, then I put Siera into a baking soda tub. After about 20 minutes of soaking I let the brothers in. Once the children were let out we dressed them in their jammies and put Aerick to bed. He was very tired and in a few minutes the older 2 children will head to bed.

Theeeeeeeeeen, it's Mommy & Daddy time. I'm thinking this Mommy needs to eat again, she's feeling rather hungry!

Interesting Night

So, my daughter decided not to nap today and the younger son and she were up so early that my son took a very early nap. Therefore I laid them down for "naps" at 3:30. It's now 8 p.m. and they're still sleeping which means tomorrow is going to be a really early morning for us and that's fine. Granted I really hope my husband is home because I need to pick up the older son from his Father's and take him to a bday party and the younger two children are going to need a nap desperately around that time...

I suppose we'll see :)

For now, I'm catching up on my shows and all I have after Private Practice is two SuperNanny's. I guess I'll have to go to bed shortly after that, LOL.

So, this is my life.

I stay home with the kids and I don't feel fulfilled. I love my children and I am so thankful I'm able to be home with them, but I'm not getting anything from it.

My husband is self employed and for the last year has been mostly home. That screws up my days like you wouldn't believe. Yet, on the same hand, I love having him home. Maybe because I feel like I shouldn't have to deal with the children as often? I have no idea. You'd think that with him being home more often that I'd get a chance to go do stuff on my own? Oh no, that's not how it works in this house.

I have an almost 6 year old son who I recently allowed to go live with his father. He was having a couple of aggravation issues in his Kindergarten class since Christmas break. We decided that my home is a volatile environment and that living with his Dad would be best for him. Hardest.decision.of.my.life! Harder than deciding to walk away from my then husband. I didn't even have to decide whether to keep my child when I found out at 19 that I was pregnant with him. This was by far the hardest decision I have ever made in my life and I just turned 26! He'll be going to the same school his father and I went to and will continue to go to the schools we went to. It's a good thing for all of us.

I have a 3 year old tomboy daughter. She's wonderful and exciting. She really keeps me on my toes, but at the same time she frustrates me to no end. I love her dearly, she's my only daughter, but... Somedays I want to just run away and she's usually the reason. She doesn't listen, she manipulates, she lies, she's awful, but I love her.

I have a just turned 2 year old boy. He's the light of my life. Is it because he's the youngest and my last? Is it just because of his personality? I have no idea, but I treasure the bond we have. He is my most laid back child. You wanna go shopping all day, Mom? That's okay, feed me and entertain me to some extent and I'll be your best buddy all day long. *sigh* I love this kid. LOL

I have a husband. A husband who is nearly 20 years older than me and tells me he loves me, but doesn't show it much. I'm working on that aspect.

I think I like blogging. Maybe THAT is what will fulfill me? Maybe this is what will keep my brain "fresh?" I love to learn and everything I've learned in the last 3 1/2 years has been child related. I want to learn to love life again...